There are moments throughout the week when, momentarily, I panic.
Standing in front of an open refrigerator my nose hovers over an open soy milk container.
I don’t know if the milk has turned rotten. The “best by” date is not visible and I can’t remember when I purchased the half gallon.
My nose gets close to the spout. I don’t smell anything.
Does soy milk even have an odor, I wonder. If it’s rotten it should. Shouldn’t it?
I gasp.
My chest tightens.
I gasp once more.
I recall reading somewhere sometime that loss of smell is a symptom of having COVID-19.
I don’t remember where I read that tidbit. Or when. Or if I even I read it. Maybe I heard it? On a podcast? A radio show? A news program? Maybe I’m making it up?
I gasp once again.
Sudden confusion is another symptom of COVID-19.
Or is it that of a stroke? AM I HAVING A STROKE?!
I CAN’T CATCH MY BREATH! THAT’S ANOTHER SIGN I HAVE COVID-19!
OR A HEART ATTACK!
Why was I in the kitchen anyway? What was I getting? I don’t have any cereal. Oh, that’s right — coffee.
And confusion. And COVID. Do I have COVID?
(While I could taste the soy milk to see if it’s rotten, the thought of tasting something rotten makes me nauseous — a symptom of something else, I’m sure.)
I put the milk away and look for something else to inhale. Lettuce. Nothing. Butter. Nothing. Tomato, spinach, plain yogurt, mayonnaise: nothing! nothing! nothing! nothing!
I call the dog over.
The dog, by now, is well aware of my symptomology run down. The first few times I forced opened her muzzle to smell her breath she initially struggled but eventually acquiesced. Now she stays away until she sees a treat in my hand.
I wave a carrot — which also smells like nothing — at her and she happily trots over.
I wait for her to stop chewing and I pry open her mouth.
The acrid almost fishy odor is the sweetest whiff of the morning.
She and I will both be glad when we can put this all behind us.
