The bittersweet flavor of holidays

My reasons for not favoring “The Holidays” are as varied as they are, to some, kooky (manufactured cheer, the promotion of inaccurate history, glorified consumerism, etc.).

But some of the traditions associated with this time of year are dear. And this year, bittersweet.

Around this time former columnist Richard Peña would write copy that retold the tales of his holidays past. (Those and the ones about Henry the crow or raven — I never learned the difference despite the number of times Richard schooled me — are my favorites.)

Typically he’d write in November that as a boy he was under the impression the Thanksgiving hoopla and dinner festivities in his Texas home were actually hubbub and buzz for his birthday, which was Nov. 28. You can understand how a child might confuse and conflate one special occasion with the other.

Still another holiday favorite was the story he’d tell detailing the days leading up to Christmas, when he’d gather his young children and escort them to San Diego where they’d be awed and fawn over the department store window displays that beckoned to families out holiday shopping.

The trek north was a holiday tradition the kids looked forward to — as did Richard’s wife Zula, who would sometimes get to stay home and attend to the chores that needed doing away from inquisitive eyes.

Reading about that tradition became a favorite holiday treat for me. There are some stories you hear time and again and they get better with age because, well, you do too, and good memories become sweeter.

But Richard died this year and there won’t be a fresh retelling of the greatest Christmas stories in the Peña household.

His family, I’m sure, have created and are celebrating their own family traditions but we won’t be reading about them. And that’s as it should be. Richard was the columnist. They have their own lives. And sometimes those lives intersect and come together, especially during the holidays.

But invariably the holidays end, the new year begins and it’s time to part ways with loved ones, as difficult and bittersweet as it may be.

In the weeks since his death we’ve republished Richard’s columns. More than just keeping his spirit alive, it was a small and simple way to pay tribute to a man who loved teaching and writing — something he did for us and the community without fail for decades.

But the end of December will find us saying goodbye to Richard’s column, “Around the South Bay.”
All good parties must end —even the ones you cherish and want to last forever because they are a beloved family tradition.

The holidays already are not the same.